15 ways to know you're living way too close to the city

Thursday, May 08, 2014
by Mike Adams, the Health Ranger
Tags: self-reliance, city life, country living

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(NaturalNews) Are you living too close to the city? Cities are great places for convenience and culture, but in any kind of a crisis -- food shortage, power grid failure, natural disaster, etc. -- cities are very dangerous places to find yourself.

People who live in cities are, almost by definition, not self-reliant. They have few redundancies and are therefore highly vulnerable to disruptions in key infrastructure.

That's why I've assembled a quick list of the top 15 ways to know when you're living too close to the city. (Yes, living in the 'burbs is probably too close as well...)

The top 15 ways to know you're living way too close to the city

#1) If your neighbors can overhear your private conversations in your own back yard, you're definitely living too close to the city.

#2) If you are prohibited from raising backyard chickens, you're living way too close to the city.

#3) If you have to walk your dog with a baggie and pick up their poop with your own hands, you are most definitely living too close to the city. (Real dogs poop in the woods and nobody picks it up.)

#4) If you think a "tractor" means a riding lawnmower, you're living too close to the city. Just because manufacturers call it a tractor doesn't really make it a tractor.

#5) If you only keep 2 days' worth of food in your refrigerator because you can "always get more at the store right down the street," you've been behaviorally impaired by living too close to the city.

#6) If you walk out your front door and can't immediately spot birds, squirrels and other wild animals, you're probably living too close to the city.

#7) If you peel an orange and throw the peel into the trash rather than a compost pile in your yard, you're living too close to the city. (Because a person who lives in the country will almost always toss vegetable matter into a compost pile or feed food scraps to their chickens.)

#8) If you're a man and can't pee right off the front porch without somebody seeing you, you're living too close to the city. (Zip up!)

#9) When you first moved into your current home, if you were greeting by a "welcoming committee" of any kind, you're probably living too close to the city. If they can get to your house that easily, so can looters.

#10) If you shoot a small 22-caliber varmint rifle on your own property and somebody calls the police, you're most definitely living too close to the city. Not every gunshot is an emergency, folks.

#11) If your bandwidth works so well that you can watch Netflix movies without interruption, you're probably living too close to the city.

#12) If your water supply contains fluoride and chlorine (because it's delivered from the city), you're definitely living too close to the city.

#13) If you need a permit to plant a garden in your own front yard, you are absolutely living too close to the city (or in too restrictive an HOA).

#14) If all your neighbors think you're crazy for "being prepared," you're way too close to the city. Even worse, all these people will be pounding on your door less than 24 hours after the food supply gets cut off.

#15) If finding a parking spot in front of your own home is a constant challenge, it's time to move: you're living way too close to the city!

10 ways to know you're far enough away from the city

How can you know you're living far enough away from the city to be insulated from systemic failures of infrastructure? Here's my checklist:

#1) If your local fire department is run by volunteers, you're probably far enough away from the city. Maybe you should volunteer too!

#2) If any of your neighbors own functioning crossbows, you're probably living far enough away from the city.

#3) If the property you bought came with a John Deere tractor (or two), you're probably living far enough away from the city.

#4) If your water is from a well and your sewage waste goes into a septic system, chances are you're a pretty good distance away from the city.

#5) If you buy 1-2 weeks worth of food at a time because going to the grocery store is a major time-consuming task, you're probably living far enough away from the city.

#6) If cable bandwidth connections are not available in your area -- and even cell phone reception is dodgy -- you're probably living far enough away from the city. (And you'll experience less electropollution as a result, too!)

#7) If any of your neighbors use the word "yonder" in regular conversation, you're no doubt living far enough away from the city. (As in: "That tree is way over yonder!") This is not a bad thing; it's a cultural thing. It just lets you know where you are.

#8) If you don't MOW your property but instead "shred" it, you're probably living far enough away from the city.

#9) If trick-or-treaters never visit your house because it's not worth their effort to hike from the street to your door, you're probably living far enough away from the city.

#10) If your neighbors have at least two of the following in their front yard, you are definitely living far enough away from the city: 1) A goat. 2) An old car on blocks. 3) A weather-beaten boat. 4) An RV. Or for the bonus round: 5) An RV on blocks!

I'll take country living over city living any day! Fresh air with every breathe, wildlife and friendly people with lots of real-world skills like farming, ranching, welding and engine repair. If something crazy goes down, I don't want to be surrounded by a city full of people who have never raised a chicken and who don't even carry a pocket flashlight. I want to be in the country where food, water and open space is readily available and in abundant supply. :-)