"It's tough to see the controversial and divisive debates that have been happening in the U.S. in the last couple of weeks involving lots of brands and companies, including and especially Bud Light," said Anheuser-Busch global chief marketing officer Marcel Marcondes at the recent Cannes Lions International Festival.
"It's tough exactly because what we do is all about bringing people together."
At no point in his statement did Marcondes admit that it was a mistake for his company's Bud Light brand to go trans, betraying the millions of faithful customers who would rather not have had a mentally ill "influencer" parading himself as the new apparent beer mascot. Instead, Marcondes celebrated himself and his company for somehow showing humility – his words – despite its promotion of pride, which is the exact opposite of humility.
"That's what we're doing, being very humble, and really reminding ourselves of what we should do best every day, which is to really understand our consumers," Marcondes bizarrely told the Cannes crowd, adding that the customer backlash was a "wake-up call" for marketers like himself, especially during "times like this."
"Which is to really celebrate and appreciate every consumer that loves our brands – but in a way that can make them be together, not apart."
(Related: Check out our earlier coverage to learn more about what happened that got Anheuser-Busch into this mess in the first place.)
Even though Bud Light has since dropped to the number-two selling beer in America behind Modelo Especial, a Mexican beer that, due to a 2013 order from the Department of Justice (DOJ), is now owned by Constellation Brands – Modelo used to be owned by Anheuser-Busch.
"That's what we all, as a team, will be doing moving forward as a group," Marcondes added. "That's what leaders do. Bud Light is coming back. It's going all around the country, reconnecting with consumers, moving forward. That's what you can expect from Bud Light in the U.S."
As Marcondes made this strange and anomalous diatribe, he also accepted an award for "Creative Marketer of the Year" at the Cannes Film Festival, which takes place in the south of France.
Contrary to Marcondes' glowing rhetoric, the beer analyst group Bump Williams found that during the four-week period ending in early June, Bud Light sales were "grim," having fallen by about 24.4 percent. Modelo sales, meanwhile, grew by 12.2 percent during that same time period.
"Modelo Especial appears to be increasing its sales growth each week as we get deeper into summer," Bump Williams told CNN, adding that other Modelo beers are also performing well.
Brendan Whitworth, the CEO of Anheuser-Busch's U.S. division, issued his own bizarre statement recently that appeared to be a reaction to the ongoing Bud Light boycott. Like Marcondes, Whitworth failed to apologize or even make mention of the Mulvaney fiasco.
"We recognize that over the last two months, the discussion surrounding our company and Bud Light has moved away from beer, and this has impacted our consumers, our business partners and our employees," Whitworth said. "We are a beer company, and beer is for everyone."
In an attempt to move Bud Light forward, Whitworth said Anheuser-Busch is taking "three important actions" that include "investing to protect the jobs of our frontline workers," as well as providing financial assistance to Bud Light wholesalers and changing its entire advertisement strategy.
If a company goes woke, chances are it will eventually go broke. Learn more at Wokies.news.
Sources for this article include: