Originally published May 29 2013
Five essential elements of natural self-confidence
by Mike Bundrant
(NaturalNews) Self-confidence comes naturally when certain elements in your psyche line up. Self-confidence is not something you have to try for. It is a result.
How do you produce the desired result?
Check out the following five elements of natural self-confidence:
1. Know your limits.
Interestingly, knowing what you can't do is an important element in knowing what you can do with confidence. I remember as a young and nervous counselor that much of my hesitation came from thinking I needed to be able to work with and cure anyone of their psychological problems.
Over time, of course, I learned which people I work best with and which people I need to refer away. What a relief! Admitting to myself that I cannot work with just anyone was a huge confidence booster. I was no longer afraid to pass on a case and I approached the people I could work with knowing I was well-equipped for the job.
Are you lacking confidence because you are biting off more than you can chew, or pretending you know something you don't?
2. Know your values.
Values are indicators of what is important to you. When you know your priorities, you can focus on them and pass on everything else.
When you are not clear on what is important in your life, something happens that undermines your confidence - you typically turn to others to determine the agenda. This puts you naturally in a one-down position.
3. Get skills.
Confidence is often tied to competence, as it should be. I want the pilot of the plane I am riding in to be confident. I want his confidence to be based squarely on his level of skill. If he doesn't have the skill to fly, he should lack confidence.
And the same goes for me in my life. When and where I don't the have skill, I am OK lacking confidence. It is possible to lack confidence in spite of having an appropriate level of skill, but competence is always a factor.
4. See others as people.
Often we feel inadequate because we see others as 'more than' and ourselves as 'less than' by comparison. We see others as having it all together and not suffering the way we are. This is rarely true.
As soon as you get to know someone beyond the public persona, you soon discover a plethora of struggles that are the hallmark of the human condition. Everyone has their cross to bear. When you tune into this fact, you will get better at seeing people as people - we are all in this together! Understanding this comes as a relief and happens to build social confidence.
5. Act!
When all is said and done, you need to just go for it! Confidence builds as you take positive action and begin to see positive results.
Take these elements of natural self-confidence and meditate on the ones that you resonate with. Take your understanding of them to a deeper level and watch your confidence grow.
About the author:
Watch the free video The AHA! Process: An End to Self-Sabotage and discover the lost keys to personal transformation and emotional well-being that have been suppressed by mainstream mental health for decades.
The information in this video has been called the missing link in mental health and personal development. In a world full of shallow, quick-fix techniques, second rate psychology and pharmaceutical takeovers, real solutions have become nearly impossible to find. Click here to watch the presentation that will turn your world upside down.
Mike Bundrant is co-founder of the iNLP Center and host of Mental Health Exposed, a Natural News Radio program.
Follow Mike on Facebook for daily personal development tips.
Watch the free video The AHA! Process: An End to Self-Sabotage and discover the lost keys to personal transformation and emotional well-being that have been suppressed by mainstream mental health for decades.
The information in this video has been called the missing link in mental health and personal development. In a world full of shallow, quick-fix techniques, second rate psychology and pharmaceutical takeovers, real solutions have become nearly impossible to find. Click here to watch the presentation that will turn your world upside down.
Mike Bundrant is co-founder of the iNLP Center and host of Mental Health Exposed, a Natural News Radio program.
Follow Mike on Facebook for daily personal development tips.
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